What are the Words you should never say?

It must have occurred to you, too, to see some video that in a few seconds seems to be able to change your life and perspective, suggesting what at first glance appears to be a brilliant idea, but then on the practical side is, in all likelihood, completely different. These mini video tutorials are more or less all the same and follow along the lines of the “5 words not to say at a meeting” or “5 words forbidden in a presentation” script. They are certainly nice videos, capable of entertaining bored people. The problem is that more and more often we get requests for such approaches, especially from young people, we want to take a few minutes to explain why these are useless and moreover counterproductive pieces of advice (and even those who pass them off as valid, know this very well).

The Importance of the Words Chosen

Inborn Voice is the undisputed leader in professional voice training, and we know full well that in the world of work and business, word of mouth is important, and that trust and one’s personal brand are the greatest added value one can count on to get ahead in one’s career, to close a contract, or to finalize a hire. In the real world, in a face-to-face setting, these “tricks” are not only not useful, they turn into a double-edged sword that backfires on those who use them. In fact, even just using them immediately sets off an alarm bell in the other person that suggests “manipulation” even to the less experienced. Without going into the professional sphere, you will surely have happened to walk through some shopping mall and be annoyed with those very phrases to present a beauty product, a vacuum cleaner or some credit card. You yourself may have recognized in those words the idea of “rip-off.” Yet their product may be the best; it is their technique that puts you on alert.

Words are important, but not as important as voice and intention

As a first step, I would like you to learn to listen better to the voice and intention of people who claim to teach you this or other secrets with respect to choosing words to say or not to say. When you hear the suggestion “don’t say can I steal you for a moment?, but instead say I have something important to share with you,” what does the voice of the supposed expert on duty convey to you? When you hear the voice of the video “don’t say I didn’t understand, but say could you elaborate?” what does the voice of the supposed expert on duty convey to you? This is where the donkey falls, where these videos mislead you.

The effect of a confident or insecure voice on word choice

During those brief moments, not surprisingly sped up so that you can review the video several times, what does the presenter’s voice communicate to you deep down? There are two cases, depending on the expert’s ability to use his or her voice.

1. The expert appears with a confident voice in both cases
2. The expert appears with an insecure voice in both cases

Very few times those who present these videos are masters of their own voice and are able to convey the intention of the two sentences in the two different modes. The secret is that the person who would instinctively say “I can steal two minutes from you” has a totally different mood and emotion than the person who says “I have something important to share with you.” Changing words without first aligning with the right deep emotion, generated by our Inborn Voice, has no practical effect except to make us regard ourselves as untrustworthy. It is useless to utter the phrase “I have something important to share with you” if your vocal intention conveys “sorry to bother you.”

The Importance of Emotions and Vibrations

As you may have guessed, it is not the words one chooses that define the message, but the emotions that flow through the voice. Words have very little importance, as Mylena Vocal Coach has demonstrated at the most prestigious universities in Italy, because they can reach, in an attentive person, a very superficial level of consciousness. Instead, it is the vibrations, the emotions, that reach the depth of the listener, even if he or she is not paying attention! If a person is sure that the information he has to give is important, even saying “I’ll only take five seconds from you,” he will do so with a voice capable of making the other party understand the value of the importance of the message to be transmitted.

The importance of the Inborn Voice

If your voice (and I would also add your facial expression) make it clear to even the less shrewd that you “didn’t understand” something, there is no point in launching into a “could you elaborate on that?” because all you will do is confirm to your interlocutor that you look stupid. Having the humility to admit that you have not fully grasped the message, or that the person who gave the explanation was not clear, is a Leadership action, not mocking the people who are giving you their time.

Conclusion

Ultimately each person can use the words he or she prefers, can even speak in a language unfamiliar to him or her. Little changes. Only by using your Inborn Voice correctly will he be able to perfectly convey the sense of his intentions. During a business meeting it is more important to highlight one’s personal brand, one’s charisma, one’s ability to generate trust than to use polished words or perfect diction. This is precisely why here at Inborn Voice we are dedicated to enhancing your voice, your identity, your personal brand. All things that only you have and make you unique and irreplaceable. Book a voice assessment meeting to find out what you are already able to convey with your Inborn Voice and how we can help you become a better person, and communicator.