Parenting: Using Your Voice Wisely – Is a Permissive, Authoritarian or Authoritative Approach Better?

Arguing about different ways of raising one’s children is a delicate subject, but sooner or later, when one finds oneself in the role of parent, it becomes crucial to address this issue. Very often, new parents tend to re-propose the style of education they received or, if they did not like it, a form of the opposite. Educating is a task that requires attention and awareness, since the choices we make then deeply influence the development and well-being of our children. Very often parents come to us looking for some kind of communicative support for their children and almost all of them are amazed when they discover that they too have to join in their children’s training sessions: in fact, communication always takes place between at least two people, it is never one-sided.

Now let’s look at these three educational approaches together in more detail with a focus on the use of voice, and since children are very perceptive to emotions rather than words, how it conveys deep emotions. Reality is always more complex than theory, so we invite you to book a voice assessment session below to find out how Inborn Voice can help you understand and set up a suitable communication style.

Permissive approach

Lets begin by considering the permissive approach. This way of bringing up children is characterised by the freedom and flexibility given to children. Permissive parents tend to be more tolerant and do not impose many limits, allowing children to explore and develop their autonomy. This is very important, but it is equally important to recognise that an excess of permissiveness may result in a lack of clear boundaries where this autonomy can exist, leaving children uncertain about what is right or wrong and depriving them of the guidance they need to navigate the world. In the context of the use of voice, permissive parents generally tend to communicate in a more calm or neutral manner, almost always avoiding any form of conflict and letting children express themselves freely without much interference. Here, too, the lack of experience in managing a conflict may prove unfavourable in later stages of growth.

Authoritarian approach

Moving on to the authoritarian approach, we see a different dynamic. Here, parents assume a more dominant role and impose strict rules and discipline. This type of upbringing may guarantee a certain degree of order and control in the family, but it tends to make children feel oppressed and restricted in their individual freedom. Without the opportunity to express their emotions and actively participate in understanding or constructing the rules, children may feel marginalised and not understood. In the authoritarian approach, the use of voice may be more assertive and authoritarian, with strong, directive tones indicating an obligation to obey without the possibility of discussion. In this case, an affective and gentle type of communication is missing, which again may be unfavourable in later stages of growth.

Authoritative approach

Finally, let us examine the authoritative approach. This educational style is based on a combination of authority and support, providing children with loving and consistent guidance. Authoritative parents set clear rules and high expectations, but at the same time are open to dialogue and understanding their children’s needs. This balance of authority and support allows children to feel safe and secure while developing a sense of responsibility and autonomy. It is an approach that promotes open communication and mutual respect, creating a positive and constructive family environment. In the authoritative approach, the use of voice is calibrated: it can be assertive when necessary, but also understanding and loving, showing empathy and respect for the children’s feelings.

It is important for children to understand that living within a society, where one does not have control over everything and everyone, entails renunciations and pain. When a parent imposes a rule that upsets the child emotionally, it is important that the same parent welcomes the child’s pain by expressing the necessary emotional affection and understanding, while keeping the rule firm and without the parent expressing guilt.

The voice of children is always a mirror of that of their parents. If a parent recognises that they have difficulty relating to others or the various challenges of everyday life, regardless of their children, then we can help them raise better children, starting with a vocal assessment meeting, which you can start by booking below.


Take the first step!

We offer world-class training to improve your personal, social and business communication skills. We specialize in presentations, leadership, media training, interviewing and Executive speaking.
Inborn Voice shapes tomorrow's leaders.

Book your first online Voice Assessment session by clicking the button below!

Book a Vocal Coaching Session

Any questions? We'll get back to you!

Are you looking to improve your voice with individual lessons, classes, or have any questions?
Fill out the form below!

*Required fields and reserved privacy!

Learn more about Inborn Voice
and Mylena Vocal Coach:
  • Free eBook!
    The Art of Keeping a Healthy Voice

    You can purchase the book on Amazon or at any bookstore. We offer you the opportunity to download for free the ebook version of Mylena Vocal Coach " The art of keeping a healthy voice ": just follow carefully the instructions you will receive by email!

    The ebook includes: ● Mylena's Vocal Coach Five Golden Rules ● 28 Practical tips ● 25 Testimonials ●  and much more!

    Learn more
  • The Way of the Voice
    A secret is hiding on everyone’s lips

    Milena cares so much about the well-being and expressiveness of people that she has already written more than one book on how to use voice and free human interpersonal skills. Her latest book, the way of the voice, explains in simple and understandable words what it is and how to tap into one's inborn voice to drastically improve one's way of expressing oneself and experiencing life.

    Learn more
  • The Voice Guru
    the new book by Mylena Vocal Coach

    QThis book contains 16 life experiences that all have a common starting point: voice training with the Inborn Voice® method. They are all people who have sought Mylena to improve their personal, professional or social communication skills. Women and men of all ages and backgrounds who, by reclaiming the sound of their own voice, have managed to turn their lives around, literally rising from the ashes like a phoenix.

    Learn More
  • Mylena Vocal Coach on Youtube
    A real Vocal Coach
    finally on Youtube

    Until now it was impossible to find a real vocal coach on youtube. Mainly you find singing teachers or critics who do not teach anything handy or who, even worse, invite you to experiment with techniques that are dangerous for the health of vocal cords. Mylena Vocal Coach makes available on her channel real vocal coaching paths suitable for anyone who wants to improve expressiveness and communication skills.

    Learn More
  • Inborn Voice Workshop with Milena Origgi
    Inborn Voice Workshops
    all around the World.

    Maybe your call is not for one to one lessons, but one-day event. Then our Workshop will be your deal. We run Workshops all over the world in big cities like Milano , London , Paris , New York , Los Angeles .

    Please contact us to be among the first to know when the next event near you is scheduled. Early birds save huge!

    Learn More

Leave a Comment