How to deal with provocation?

Provocations are an inevitable part of modern life. Whether in personal, professional or virtual interactions, knowing how to behave and possibly respond appropriately is critical to maintaining one’s integrity. We will look at different strategies for dealing with provocation, focusing on how to remain clear-headed, choose the right emotions, and turn the situation into an opportunity for personal growth.

The Inborn Voice method is deeply rooted in awareness of one’s own emotions and especially listening to those of others, in fact this component is central to our approach to Coaching. First of all, a distinction must be made. The “Inborn Voice” method takes its name precisely from the idea of Inborn Voice, which is an ancient, if you will, primordial form of language based on the transmission and reception of emotions between human beings regardless of the words chosen and used. You have surely had the chance to see some “expert” advising what words to use, the perfect sentence, the best course of action, but have you ever wondered what it means to put that advice into practice? Do you really think it is enough to say a magic phrase in your insecure and altered or impostured voice to get appreciable results, or are you instead convinced that words are nothing if not backed up by a voice, or better, a suitable Inborn Voice?

Most coaches want to make everything seem easy, immediate and even reassuring. The reality is that such shortcuts that we like so much, when put into practice perhaps during a job interview or an important moment with one’s partner/child, our credibility drops below zero. The first to come across as untrue and incoherent are precisely all those people who apply these outdated techniques, which perhaps had a grounding in the 1950s. It is not enough to “imagine” working on the tone of voice, to insert a few pauses because our voice (and our ability to listen to the voice of others) has thousands of vibrations and potentials. All of which we study and research together with universities around the world right here at Inborn Voice, offering the whole industry a revolutionary and truly brilliant look.

Vocal awareness: The fundamental first step

The first thing to do is to understand one’s own Inborn Voice. We ourselves are but a reflection of this language made up of emotions, which is ours alone and lives within us. Each of us has one that is totally independent and different from the others. We must learn to listen to, accept and receive these emotions, just as we do with any other information that comes to us in order to then be able to transmit them to others in the correct way and not under the influence of automatisms, of reactions, which are anything but suitable tools to achieve a result.

When faced with provocation, everyone’s instinctive reaction is different and was learned growing up. It matters very little where and how we learned this reaction. For some it might be to respond verbally with aggression, for others even violence might come at a physical level. Certainly it is essential to remain calm, but not to avoid fueling conflict. Calm is necessary to take a moment, perhaps breathing deeply through the diaphragm, and listen to the emotions involved. This makes the difference between those who are leaders and those who are just reacting. Impulsiveness is a strategy that is always the same and therefore certainly not adaptable to different situations. If your “instinctiveness” so far has gotten you nowhere or if it has served you to get ahead in your career, to find a romantic relationship, it may no longer be suitable to continue or grow beyond that. Certainly a Voice Realignment™ path would help you unlock your true potential.

All provocations occur on an emotional level

Once it is understood that every interaction occurs because it is driven by emotions, it is important to understand those of the other party in order to make them your own before responding. In fact, your Inborn voice must become, as Mylena Vocal Coach always says, a kind of inner compass suitable to guide you in the right direction. Normal people, without Inborn Voice training, when overwhelmed by strong emotions, usually react in two ways:

1. Ignore emotions: Of course, you can become “unaware” of your emotions or try through meditation to “turn them off.” This insensitivity is so ingrained that one does not even notice that an emotion is going through the body on a conscious level. However, it is always possible to become aware of one’s reactions or a whole series of “health” symptoms, for example, those related to stress, which in the long run give rise to a series of somatizations, i.e., actual illnesses. “Stress” is the most important symptom for a person to realize that he or she is not listening to his or her Inborn Voice.
2. Reacting instinctively to emotions: In this case, the emotion-reaction combination is so automatic that one does not even recognize the passage of the emotion or one’s own reaction. So many times people find themselves performing actions that they themselves have said over and over again that they do not want to repeat, precisely because this automatism is really rooted in the intimacy of one’s being.

Emotions Are Real, Reactions Can Be Chosen

As Mylena Vocal Coach says, “Your emotions are always real, but they have nothing to do with your reactions. Emotions exist and run through you, your reaction is your choice, probably on a subconscious level, that you have learned. Emotions mirror your Inborn Voice, your reactions mirror your identity. Inborn Voice is part of your oldest essence, while you can practice what you want with your identity, defining your Personal Brand at will.”

For example, anger is certainly a powerful and undeniable emotion, but then it is your choice how you react. You can choose to raise your voice, hit something or lower your gaze. Every behavior is learned, and if this is anything but counterproductive or unnatural, with the Inborn Voice method you can remove it. Sadness is also a persistent emotion that can pervade your entire being, but choosing to take refuge in alcohol or chaos is an unnatural response that can be dissolved through the intervention of the Inborn Voice method. Loneliness is an emotion that is often frightening, but continually returning to a toxic relationship is your choice, which although you are aware is wrong, you only repeat.

The same applies to everyone else. Don’t focus on their reactions, but on their emotions. Only by speaking the language of emotions, by activating your Inborn Voice, will you be able to really understand how they feel and help them understand how to begin a Voice Realignment path.

The First Step Toward Voice Realignment

The first step toward Voice Realignment between your Inborn Voice and your identity, to reconnect with your emotions, recognize them and become aware of them is to schedule a voice assessment session with Mylena Vocal Coach or one of her Certified Coaches. Every provocation is nothing more than an opportunity to learn something new about yourself and others. Rather than seeing provocation as a personal attack, it is good to see it as an opportunity to take a close look at one’s emotions, reactions and then improve one’s communication skills. Ultimately, addressing provocations with a reactivated Inborn Voice can turn a potential source of stress into an experience of personal growth and enrichment