Can you really persuade anyone to do anything?
There are actually quite some people who think this way. Usually they are sleazy or manipulative people. So is this skill something that really makes sense to learn? I mean, is “persuasion” to be considered a useful skill or just a way to mislead people?
Well, it all depends on what meaning you give to the word “persuade” and the ethics of the coach you’re dealing with. Certainly it is possible to learn techniques capable of influencing the way people, and even the masses, think. These are not techniques that I consider ethical and they certainly won’t get you anywhere. Being able to “control” weaker minds is not something to be proud of. These are techniques that are based on hypnosis, NPL or variations of the two. These are techniques that will never get you ahead in your career, in business, or in raising healthy children, because the prerequisite is dealing with weak minds. This has nothing to do with my work as a Vocal Coach, at least not what I teach my trainee.
The word “persuasion” literally means “bring over by talking”. So the first prerequisite is that there is some disagreement, some argument, the second is that you are talking and not raising voices. These are the necessary preconditions. Without these preconditions, one cannot speak of persuasion, but only of scamming someone. No court has any doubt about that.
So the goal of persuading must be considered as the intention to reach an agreement, a common point between the parties. As a Vocal Coach I teach my method, Inborn Voice, which means I will first teach you how to listen. This is the way of the voice. When you learn to listen to others, you may even find that it was nothing more than a misunderstanding. It may even be possible that you were both advocating exactly the same idea, yet you were expressing it in a conflicting way, unconsciously. This part of the training is peculiar to Inborn Voice, as I am still the only vocal coach on this planet who teaches people how to listen. A training of the ear, not to listen to words, but to receive emotions.
The second step in my training approach will be to allow you to find empathy with the other party’s emotions. Once found, you will be able to express your point of view without hurting his or her feelings. It will not matter what words you choose to use, your grammar or your accent. Your eye contact, and your ability to “decode” neurolinguistic programming won’t matter either.
That’s why my work is so successful internationally among the top CEOs of leading companies. Because it is possible to acquire great communication skills, but certainly not in 5 minutes or via a recorded video lesson. Each one of us is unique and that’s why I’m proud to be a Vocal Coach who still works like a craftsman, on a bespoke basis!
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First of all I want to say excellent blog! I’ve had a difficult time understanding it at first!